Search Requests of the Damned.

Even while I was on hiatus I still collected the bizarre search request queries that would show up in my referrer logs. We live in a world of unparalled depravity.

enema blog
Oddly enough Volume 22 was originally going to be an enema blog, but I decided that was just too messy.

ant+pen+porn
This came from Google Thailand. All I'll say is that if anyone finds any ant pen porn will you please let me know. It's for research purposes. I swear.

miced burned by car engines
Ordinarily in a situation like this I'd have something really clever to say, but I'm left oddly speechless.

what does it mean when your 22 year old watches too much porno?
That he's normal? And just how much is too much? I need to know. For research purposes.

cooked alive by a woman
I'm not sure if the searcher is for or against being cooked alive by a woman.

wanking schedule
But won't the pencil get all sticky?

"my vagina" "not porn"
OK, your vagina's not porn, but I don't know why you'd think there'd be any information about it on my blog. I don't even know you. Or do I?

japanese bubblegum blowing -crisis -crash
I always relate Japanese bubble blowing with crises and crashes.

who trapped frogs for a zoo before he hit upon the idea of frozen foods
I don't know, but now I really wish I did.

exoskeleton porn
Next someone will search for "barely legal exoskeleton porn".

why do penises go pink and blotchy?
They do that before they fall off. Or at least that's what happened to mine.

buddy holly everyday wanking
I think that was the name of the album he was working on before he died.

And these are all kind of old, so if you hit the links, Volume 22 isn't listed on the first page of hardly any of these.