Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Geese vs. Cheetos

Saturday at Sam's Club I bought a big bag of Cheetos and ate them until I felt like I wanted to barf. What to do with the rest? I certainly wasn't going to eat them. In fact, I don't think I'll be eating Cheetos ever again. Anyway, this morning I decided to take them down to the river and fed them to the geese. Here's the video:

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Another tiresome anniversary

Earlier today I remembered this blog has an anniversary this month. I started it November 10, 2002, which, in blog terms, was like 50 years ago. So, the old blog is seven years old. How, you may ask, does one manage to keep a blog for seven years? Easy, just write a post every month or two so that people can tell it hasn't been completely abandoned. Also, it helps not to have a life.

And for absolutely no reason, I present to you, my loyal blog-readers, How is babby formed.

Tuesday, November 03, 2009

Ten things on a Thursday

Apparently, I've been chosen for some kinda meme thing. I never liked these meme thingies, too much like work. Anyway, I'm required, if I understand the premise, to list ten things I do on a Thursday, despite the fact that it's not even close to Thursday.

1. Good gravy. Everything I do on Thursday is pretty much what I do on the other days of the week, especially the weekdays. I lead a dull and depressing life that doesn't hold up to analysis.

That was one wasn't it? No? Damn.

1. Wallow in abject misery.

Now I know that's one.

2. Wish it were Friday. Specifically I wish that it's Friday after 3:30PM, which means I can wash the machine shop filth off of me and begin vegetating in front of the computer in a much more intensive way than I had been doing over the previous workdays.

Why can't it be Friday right now instead of crappy, useless Tuesday. Nothing good ever happens on Tuesday.

I'm losing track of the meme. Thursday. Things I do on Thursday.

O.K.

4. Shit. I haven't written a three yet.

3. Most people would list something about watching some TV show that comes on Thursdays, but I don't even turn the damn TV on on Thursday. If my life depended on it I don't think I could tell you anything that came on Thursday with the exception of Top Gear, which I don't watch on Thursdays; I watch it on Mondays.

I still haven't written a three yet.

3. Put on socks.

4. Cut myself at work. I cut myself pretty much every day at work, so this counts.

5. Check behind the bathroom door for snakes. I didn't write about this on my blog, but I found a small snake behind my bathroom door in September and then I found a second one in the same place exactly a month later. They were non-poisonous and about as deadly as earthworms, but now I'm traumatized for life.

God, I have five more to go. This is never going to end.

6. Digest the food I've consumed.

Lame, I know, but I'm desperate man.

7. Go through a few celebrity blogs in hopes that some actress or singer I think is hot wore a see-through dress. Sad, I know, but it keeps me off the streets.

8. I take a shower. Not that I only shower on Thursdays, no that would be nasty. I shower most days because my job's filthy.

God, this is so boring. It would've been far more interesting if I really did only shower once a week. My labored justification for such a nasty habit would've at least been amusing. Well, maybe.

9. Practice my old professional ballet dancer routines.

No, that's a bald-faced lie.

9. Roll over, look at the clock, and hope that it's at least an hour or more before I have to get up and face another day of tedium.

10. Get out of bed and groan at the thought of another boring, filthy day at work.

There, I did it. That's ten. Deal with it.

I think I'm supposed to pick ten other folk and foist this abomination upon them, but I don't even read regular folks' blogs that much anymore. I think this one has maybe three or four regular readers and I don't even read their blogs most of the time because I'm too busy doing something boring. So, I'll make you a deal. If you want to write a blog entry, but can't think of anything to write about, then do this ten things on a Thursday thing. Or don't do it. I don't really care.